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A friend of mine emailed this to me, and I had to post it here..
I, the penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:
I do physical labor.
I work at great depths.
I plunge head first into everything I do.
I do not get weekends off or public holidays.
I work in a damp environment.
I don’t get paid overtime.
I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.
I work in high temperatures.
My work exposes me to contagious diseases.
Regards,
The Penis
Dear Penis,
After assessing your request and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:
You do not work 8 hours straight.
You fall asleep on the job after brief periods of time.
You do not always follow the orders of the management team.
You do not stay in your allocated position, and often visit other areas.
You do not take initiative, you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.
You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
You do not always observe necessary safety regulations, such has wearing the correct protective clothing.
You’ll retire before reaching 65.
You’re unable to work double shifts.
You sometimes leave your allocated position before you havecompleted the day’s work.
And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and leaving the workplace carrying 2 suspicious looking bags.
Sincerely,
Management
teehee.
My cousin’s wedding was awesome, He told me he was marrying the most beautiful girl in the world, and that it was the happiest day of his life, and if that wasn’t enough, he rounded off by telling some of his friends I was his favourite cousin 
Well he’s mine.. and I hope he’s happy.