A Thinking Post
Once upon a time, there were 2 friends. They shared alot of their thoughts and feelings with eachother about their lives, how others affected them, how they were progressing through life, and supported eachother when things were down. Then one day, they had a falling out. No one is sure how they did, but it lead to misunderstandings, and things were said, misinterpretted, motives questions, and it left the friends sitting on either side of a very large gulf of misinformation. Neither talking to the other, no efforts made to repair the damage. So one of the friends made a reconciliation attempt and waited for a response. They hoped it was going to be successful.
Then we could talk about people’s lack of interest in trying to move things along in an organisation where the attitudes are too formal and some people are stale or lack genuine motivation to help improve processes. Whilst management pushes for participants to use their initiative, they don’t want to squash it, or deny it but still nothing happens. Tomorrow’s meeting is going to be a washout. I feel like not turning up myself. Some of the managers don’t seem to want to participate, they aren’t contributing to the manager’s thread about what they might want to discuss, so I feel like it’s pointless now. I almost feel like I should just not bother. However if i did that, then like other people before me, I would end up being bitter and twisted at a system that won’t change or finds it hard to. So I’ll keep at it, since I don’t give up that easily, it will have to be that things need to be moved along, kicking and screaming if need be.
It’s not that the gloss from work is wearing off, because I still love my job and work at it to the best of my ability, but I don’t get acknowledged by people that I am doing well, one of the guys from work does well when dealing with customers, and he’s getting commendations, and I am not. I feel actually put out a little, I know I am doing a good job, my customers are happy with me, I try and follow through as best I can with problem customers to ensure they are happy but deep down, I need acknowledgement that I am doing well. I had let some of the problems with friends affect the way I was working last month, but not this month - I leave them at home where they belong. I have early starts this week, 6am till 2.30pm - that is going to kill my social life. and I just remembered I am going out tonight - FUCK *sigh*