Aging…
I’ve realised that I’m going to be 36 this year. Not a startling revelation. I think normally I haven’t worried about age because it’s not really been important to me. Never a factor in my attitude to life, to work. I feel like I am living the life I should have had when I was in my 20s.
What prompted the revelation? Grey hair. I started going grey when I left my previous relationship through stress. However those were small bits.. nothing major. When I was brushing my hair, I noticed today that there was a hair, that had been grey for a little while.. at least a few months.. it started off brown, then half way through turned silvery white. At least I’ll have a stylish colour when I do go all grey.
It’s not great surprise that age happens. It’s triggered in me a series of what if’s and a reminder of a conversation I had with my sister when she once commented that she felt like she had life pass her by.
Wow, I thought, she’s 2 years younger than me and already feeling like she is past it. I remember commenting that choosing to focus on age then sure it would be easy to feel … lifeless.
i don’t feel like I am getting older, I guess somethings ache a bit more.. my childbearing years… something else I think about, are probably past me now.
My life to date is the sum of my experiences and decisions that I have made. It’s a sombre thought really.
Work rocks, but I was struck with the thought, what have I contributed to my fellow team members at work, and I don’t know - probably nothing? I focus more on how I can help my team more than on what I can do to help my fellow team members. Should really think about that and look at what I can do for them.